Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Emotions in your Relationships: Happy or Sad?

 If you want to feel good and be empowered in your relationships...you've got two choices.

1 Lock yourself in a cupboard so you can't interact with troublesome people

2  Only interact with people you like

3  Learn to interact better in all your relationships, so you feel good. That's called being "empowered". Being the person of power in your own life.

This list of emotions that you feel, indicate where you are relative to your relationships. The top seven emotions are great but if you experience the rest of the emotions, and you still want to have great relationships, you need to learn how to do this. The sooner you do, the better you will feel and the happier live you will lead.



 
  Emotional Guidance Scale
1.
Joy/Appreciation/Empowered/Freedom/Love
2.
Passion
3.
Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness
4.
Positive Expectation/Belief
5.
Optimism
6.
Hopefulness
7.
Contentment
8.
Boredom
9.
Pessimism
10.
Frustration/Irritation/Impatience
11.
Overwhelm
12.
Disappointment
13.
Doubt
14.
Worry
15.
Blame
16.
Discouragement
17.
Anger
18.
Revenge
19.
Hatred/Rage
20.
Jealousy
21.
Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness
22.
Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness
From the book “Ask and It is Given”, pg. 114


Learn how to deal with difficult people and enjoy your life more. Email janice@attitudespecialist.com

Friday, August 21, 2015

Emotional Guidance in Your Relationships

As youngsters generally we're not taught about our feelings and emotions, yet they are a vital clue as to whether we're on track creating success for ourselves. We know when we're feeling happy or sad, angry or hurt, disappointed or elated but what's the use of these feelings if we don't understand why we are experiencing them.

Basically, negative feelings mean our outer world does not make us happy....and the more unhappiness we're experiencing the more things we need to do, to make us happy.

With six areas of life to set goals in: You, Health, Relationships, Work, Finances, Spiritual/Community and our mind. body and soul guiding us...sometimes we've more changes to make than we can handle. However, if you decide what you want that will make you happy (soul decision) and change your thoughts (mind decision) then you take action which is a (body decision)
you'll be feeling empowered in your life.

On this chart, (borrowed from Abraham and Ester Hicks), you can decide how you feel now and where you want to be. It doesn't matter which area of your life, but in this assessment and our topic of difficult people and relationships, decide where your emotions are relative to your relationship

Ask yourself these questions:
  1. How do I feel NOW about my relationship with the difficult people in my life?
  2. What do I want to say/do which I can't do now?



Then ask yourself these questions:
  1. How would I like to feel in the FUTURE about relationships?
  2. What do I need to learn to do?
  3. What action am I willing to take to create win/win happy enjoyable relationships in my life?
Nelson Mandela used these words in a poem: Your playing small does not serve the world.
I added a few more words to that quote....And it doesn't serve me either.

So, if you want those great relationships, you need to learn (like I did) how to create them.

Email Janice for any questions or 12 Month Membership Information. Click Here

Saturday, August 8, 2015

Creating New Boundaries in Your Relationships

Some people have said 'it's selfish' when you don't look after them...or stop looking after them and doing things they want you to do for them. This isn't true....when you are looking after your own needs first and their needs second.

In fact, they are being selfish when they want you to look after them before you look after yourself. They are wearing two hats. I want you to look after me (I'm being selfish) but when you want to look after you (You are being selfish). It is their needs which are met in both situations whilst yours are not. It's what is called a win/lose relationship...Win for them and Lose for you!!If not now, eventually this leaves you feeling not ok!

If you're not healthy and happy, you are not doing a good job of living your life. When you are making them happy and healthy as your foremost goal,  you will become increasingly unhappy and eventually resentful.

Here's an overview with EITHER and OR situations:


Change your Personal Power

in Difficult Relationships
 

YOU IN A Difficult Relationship Situation 
 

            CHOICE 1                                        CHOICE 2                 


Living life Now                                               Living Life Tomorrow                     

Not Empowered  L                    OR              Empowered J

Saying Yes to others/No to you    OR              Say No to others & Yes to you
                                                                                                                                          

Unhappy Feeling/Not OKL        OR              Happy feeling/OKJ
                                                          

Old boundaries                             OR             New boundaries

(Unhappy & Your Past)    L        OR                (Happy & Your Future)J
 

Doing things you don’t want       OR             Making you happy

 (Feel used)     L                          OR                (Feel in control of you)J


Being abused by someone            OR             Creating new boundaries

(Feel abused)   L                          OR               Feel happy)J
                                                                                            

Put up with things you don’t like OR            Spend time on your goals

(Feel undeserving)    L                OR            (Feel worthy & successful) J

 

                           YOU DECIDING WHICH WAY TO LIVE YOUR LIFE

 
LOSE/LOSE RELATIONSHIP L   OR  WIN/WIN L                                     

LIVE BELOW POTENTIAL L         OR  CREATE YOUR POTENTIAL L


DON’T CREATE DREAMS   L        OR  CREATE YOUR DREAMS J


DON’T CREATE SUCCESS  L        OR   CREATE YOUR SUCCESSJ


UNDERACHIEVE IN LIFE L          OR   ACHIEVE J                                      


You will see that Choice 1 which is maybe where you are right now, will never bring you the happiness and success across all areas of your life, until you start to set new boundaries for yourself.

It's one step at a time...but as the quote goes: When the student is ready, the teacher appears.

I Urge you go on your journey of empowering yourself to create new boundaries for yourself in your life and with others as you develop and create the dreams and success you desire in you life. You will always be supported by someone on your journey...it starts with you saying 'Yes to You!"

There is no-one in the world who has the same fingerprint as you - and the world needs everyone to step up to become their greatest....Your day can start today!

More information about help with difficult relationships here:
http://difficultpeoplehelp.com/free-offer-3/  


Friday, August 7, 2015

Changing Your Thoughts from Negative to Positive

If you let your mind, it will 'run away' on a journey of its own, with negative thinking about almost every topic in the world.

When one part of your brain start to think about making changes to improve your life, another part of your brain will think lots of reasons why you should not do anything different in your life. Thoughts like: you can't, you're not good enough, it's scary, what if you fail and many other excuses that halt your progress.
 
Once you decide you want to feel happier, improve your relationships, believe in yourself, create more success, think positive or any other goal you set yourself, it takes some commitment to start to change your thoughts  to create a new life for yourself.
 
It's like a thought is on a see saw....as you create new boundaries in your life for yourself, your relationships and your goals.
 
 
 
This is absolutely normal and a bit of a challenge It's one thought at a time that you are daily, minute by minute, even every second starting to control the thoughts in your brain so you can create the special unique person you were born to become. Gradually all the thoughts in your brain begin to mainly focus on these positive thoughts below. It doesn't happen overnight, but it does happen when you begin to learn this process.
Here's some famous people who have been on the same journey, you can embark on:
  • John Assaraf (Top motivational guru & business man) Once hung out with gangs
  • Louise Hay (Top motivational guru Owner of Hay House) Once  had cancer
  • Dr Joe Vitale (Top motivational/spiritual  & business man) Once homeless & broke
  • Oprah Winfrey (Top motivational TV presenter & more) Once abused
Everyone has a challenge to change their thoughts, it is up to you to learn to value yourself and relationships and daily take steps to create them your dreams in all areas of your life.

Want to learn to change your difficult relationships? Click here

Thursday, August 6, 2015

3 reasons to Improve Your Relationships with Difficul People

Here are three fabulous reasons to improve your relationships with difficult people which will make you feel better about yourself and your life.

Learning to create better relationships with these people is setting new boundaries for yourself. It's about saying Yes to you....while saying No to them. However, it's about using phrases and words that are empowering. It's not yelling and screaming, it's you learning to have the confidence, courage, understanding, right skill set to start to improve your life for you.

You are with yourself from when you were born and no-one has spent as much time with you as yourself. You will be with yourself until you leave planet earth, so why wouldn't you want to make sure you enjoy the rest of your life as best you are able.

Some of this starts will having a better relationship with yourself first and then with the other people in your life.

We all want to be loved, but we want to feel great in our relationships.

These 3 reasons are why:

HAPPINESS: Your life is about creating your happiness. Difficult people make you feel unhappy, so your inner wisdom ‘gut for men’,’ intuition for women’ is indicating you need to learn to change to make yourself happy.

STRESS: Research shows challenging relationships causes stress. Talking or thinking about these incidents your brain recalls the stress again and because it’s one of the world’s biggest diseases it’s healthier to reduce your stress.


Move from this relationship


ENERGY: You need energy to create your happiness and success. When it is spent on difficult relationships, you have less energy and urge to make yourself happy and successful.
 
 To communicating like this in relationships
 

Learning to have better relationships with difficult and challenging people and bullies, is about being a better, happier you with some new skills and boundaries for your life, happiness and success.

Want to learn more about the Difficult People Mastery Program. Click Here