Self Esteem and Bullying Affects Workplace Performance
In the land of tall poppies, it appears self esteem issues has raised its ugly head in our professional life in the work environment.
Additionally, during this ‘r’ time, as people and businesses are facing work redundancies, loss of business and other factors, people need to concentrate to remain confident in their own abilities as they and refocus their future. Albeit, they need to remind themselves they did not cause the recession and maintain their level of high esteem as they seek positive solutions during this time of challenge, through motivation and a positive attitude.
With NZ’s present suicide rates high and our steady decline of personal responsibility, sense of achievement and purpose, esteem is also affecting the professional lives of New Zealanders.
Human nature wants acceptance and appreciation in relationships which results in people ‘feeling good’. Unfortunately many people have not learnt an optimistic way to establish and create this and negative soul destroying bullying type of relationships are formed.
If it is un-encouraging at home, it filters to school and eventually into our workplaces It shows up as negativity, underperformance, bulling and other under achieving behaviour that is wasting the wages the employee is being paid and those they influence.
Additionally, a person who is bullying wants to feel good, be recognized and powerful at no matter what cost. They do it at the expense of another employee which accounts for two employees not working at their full potential.
Bullies have low self esteem. They may not portray that, but inside there is a person who wants to be accepted and loved, who doesn’t know any other way and so they become very clever. They find a vulnerable spot of a person and wedge their thought and ideas onto the person subtly and skillfully, often without the awareness by the second party it is taking place. People who once had confidence often may not realise what is occurring, except whereas once they felt confident in themselves and okay, they are now losing or have lost their confidence and feeling inadequate and dreading going to work.
In most cases, once a person realises they are being bullied, they usually seek resolution with the appropriate department heads or boss. Often this does not occur except further analysis and examination of the bullying situation, which re-enforces the bully’s power and has the opposite affect on the victim. Consequently they leave and the bully is waiting for its next prey.
If every few months you require a replacement employee in a certain department, it could be indicative there is a bully around who displays their destructive behaviour until either the new replacement is manipulated or leaves.
Some symptoms of low esteem
1. Lacking coincidence to learn, make sales or try a new role
2. Negative attitude, complaining and criticising others.
3. Overbearing or autocratic team player
4. Focuses on others problems rather than being responsible for their own
5. Quiet, shy employees who lack confidence
6. Egotistical employee who belittles bullies others
With over forty workshops during the past three years, one of the biggest learning curve for majority of people has been around the issue of self-esteem and unfortunately the most consistent bullying is done by women to women. However, once identified the problem has been half solved with additional counseling sought to re-establish the confidence of the person on the receiving end of the bullying and educate them that if it was not them it would be another person.
On the upside is high esteem. People who establish win/win supportive relationships where they help others, offer advice when asked, set goals are willing to learn, team players who generally help others but not at their own expense.
These people can become employees involved in mentor /mentee relationship and can assist educate them to be empowered, which is the single biggest factor that any human can do for another.
In homes, schools and in the community and workplaces, to create a new psyche in New Zealand, education is needed to improve the low esteem level of many New Zealanders.
Not a job to be taken lightly, for those whose self esteem is intact it may well be because the influence of people in their past.
Albeit a family member, sports coach, friends, strangers or managers who have what I phase ‘shoulder-tapped’ others to have the confidence to learn and succeed, are effectively angels or change agents in disguise. They encourage people to try something new which boosts their esteem and kick starts them to live life positively.